“PRIVATELY, I AM NO ONE ”

do you know the thing
of having romantic feelings 
for your future self?
unfold the headline
BABY GIRL RAISED BY 
FEMALE PANTHER 
to hang above my desk 
yeah, but it’s been a minute
hard when the future is 
the crunch split sound 
of plastic stuffed into 
a too-full trash can 
now I fall asleep and wonder
is my brother still living the old life? 
is that why he never calls? 
circles of ash kiss 
honey wheat floor boards 
in living rooms where 
everything leans against 
everything else ––
I do miss the wisdom 
of the night, and the old life, 
and the life that never was
before I learned how clotheslines
can be romantic/tragic too
dry fingers unpinning
good intentions 
before it rains