Manual As The Map

I wanted the body and the voice

and to be tall again,

but not the rest of it

and I can't understand how

teens experience context collapse,

and should be so aware 

of multiple audiences.

We had the teacher, the parent, the peer,

and a timeline that began before records,

you could choose your battles.

Mine began at 12, farewell to Lego,

gnashing in rage where the memory

had faltered

and the manual vanished,

so the petrol station

I once built and dismantled

in precision was lost to me

five years prior, when genres

were so different.

To know five years today

is to know two of those have 

been the cats slowly

recognising something is up,

and for me, today, to be recognised 

as vaguely positive for the 

couple of sentences I could spare

for the cashier at Home Depot.